“There’s rosemary, that’s for remembrance. Pray you, love, remember. And there is pansies, that’s for thoughts. . .”

I would like to dedicate this brief post to the memory of my Aunt.

She left us two weeks ago, after a battle (with cancer) hard fought. I’m still trying to comprehend the loss. I’m in my forties…a time in life when the harshness of human frailty begins to come into focus. it’s the time in our lives when we realize that wolves circle just beyond the comforting fire that our family and friends are seated around. But understanding and reconciliation are two different things. There are so few people in this world whom we share life’s experiences with…and even fewer who love us for who we are.

My Aunt’s home had an open door. And everyone who passed through it was family in her eyes. She loved them all unconditionally. Many of them were friends who passed through my cousins’ lives briefly, but no matter. While they meant something to her children, they were treated as family. She was a presence in my life at every step…every holiday, every birthday, every graduation…as proud of her niece as she was of her own children. And though we saw each other only infrequently as I became an adult, I always knew that she was there, with her door open.

And so this is my little posey of rosemary and pansies…memories and thoughts…I’ll remember her love of gardening and crafts, her eye for repurposing things others considered too worn out to value, her Christmas babka, and the afghan she made that still lies at the foot of our bed, the penchant she seemed to have for dogs almost the same size as she was.

Our families are like candles…they burn forever bright at one end and, with time, grow shorter at the other. But the memory of all those who gave it light will continue to guide…